No matter where you are in the world of weed, you can always depend on Twitter to reflect the highs, lows, joys, and pains of your stoner’s life. With savage CBD oil memes, 420 musings, and the hashtag #stonerproblems, the life of the modern toker can be seen in all its glory on Twitter.
For June, we’re highlighting the tweets that remind us of all the painfully funny shit that can happen when you’re high AF out in public. So keep your cool, have your eye drops ready, and enjoy.
“Sorry, were you talking?”
when you high and you been hearing something for awhile and you look over and it was your Bestfriend talking to you pic.twitter.com/s7yJwW7xk5
— HeyitsFranklin (@ZhxTxt) October 11, 2015
when you high and you been hearing something for awhile and you look over and it was your Bestfriend talking to you pic.twitter.com/XHNs9EupOJ
— ISZY (@_iszy) February 17, 2018
The age-old conversation (or lack thereof) you have with your bestie when you’re high and they’re not — exemplified by two of our greatest modern pop queens, Beyoncé and Lady Gaga.
When You Take an Edible 30 Minutes Before a Meeting
When your boss calls a last-minute Friday meeting and you jumped the gun on your edible. pic.twitter.com/5I1SuNKScS
— Birddogs (@birddogs) March 3, 2017
Sucks when you jump the gun on an edible and something comes up at work. Just do your best to keep your cool.
Embarrassing Your Squad
When youre high af and see the squad pic.twitter.com/U8y1nfH2e0
— 420 Humor (@The420Humor) July 6, 2015
If you’re reading this, you might be that friend in the group — the one who shows up to a gathering with a conspicuously big grin on their face and a loud, embarrassing greeting. Hey, somebody’s gotta do it.
Don’t Mind Me, Just Eatin’ Ice Cream with the Tools at My Disposal.
There’s being stoned, and then there’s ‘eating ice cream on a train with a lighter’ type of stoned pic.twitter.com/XSfZugGsFx
— Stoner Nation™ (@ThaStonerNation) April 11, 2016
More proof that stoners are some of the most resourceful cats in the universe. We may not always have a fork handy, but we’ll make do with the tools we typically do have.
“Can I Get Uhhhhhhhhh…”
High af ordering food like pic.twitter.com/GPahBCK3lm
— 420 Humor (@The420Humor) September 8, 2015
When you’re high and out to eat, staring down a menu is like standing at the bottom of Mount Olympus. But don’t worry, soon the autopilot will kick in and you’ll have an ample selection of value menu items in your belly.
High at the Grocery Store
— jor ☪ (@Teencatpuke) August 15, 2014
The other, slightly less-stressful Mount Olympus we’ve all climbed at the local 24-hour pharmacy. When all else fails, just go for the Cheetos and be done with it.
If You Spark It, They Will Come
When you spark a blunt at a party pic.twitter.com/SQLU1HOXqu
— Weed Humor (@WeedHumor) April 25, 2017
We’ve all been the one to spark a blunt at a party, only to watch it go way too quickly for comfort. If this tweet hits particularly close to home for you, maybe it’s time to give yourself a break and let some other toker feed the masses for a change.
Well-Prepared For a Speech
— Alberto Capone™ (@TooDayzed) June 8, 2014
Whether it’s a TED talk or a wedding toast, giving a public speech can be a nerve-wracking experience for anyone. In some cases, it might be preferable to calm the nerves with a healthy puff beforehand. That way you can distract yourself from your jitters with the challenge of making the speech without looking high AF.
Featured image by Joseph Gruenthal/Unsplash
Andy Andersen is a writer at Weedmaps with a bachelor’s degree in English and German Studies. When he’s not working on useful, engaging content for the cannabis sphere, Andy can be found devouring and writing about movies, music, and literature. His happy place is in front of the TV with his bong and two cats, Poe and Rigby.